my prayer...for you my little one

Tears stain my face

Caught in my own shadow

Little one I feel you move in my belly

I feel you

I feel you feel me

I hope I give you the safety you need to feel

Need to have…to survive

Praying for you

That you will be safe from all the paths I traveled upon that has lead me here

I know there is a easier way

Maybe not easy but it doesn’t have to painful or full of struggle

Little one I hope I have not scared you …imprinted you with my own faults

That I work so hard to rid myself from

These human coils

What d I do?

I have came so far… I pray you wont trace the routes I took to find grace

You have it now

You are perfect

You are divine

You are loved

You have to do nothing

You just are……

Little one I wish I was taught this

I wish I would have known … I have wasted so much time

Here I am waiting for you

I hope I make you feel loved.needed and wanted

Something I cant recall from my mother (bio)

I cant recall anything about her… not her eyes

Not her touch

Her scent

Her grace

Her voice

Nothing except that she was not capable of caring for me

I was sent to a family that could. very lucky yet crave …hunger.. to remember

To remember what I will consciously give you

All my love

My devotion

My faith in you in our family

A orphan has her own family now

It is my responsibly to make things right

Im sorry if I haven’t been the best mommy

I feel like I haven’t because of my pregnant emotional instability

I don’t mean to imprint you with anything harmful

You must understand

I do try….

I hope we always get along. always find our love in the midst of any disagreement

I love you.. you were made of love. you are love