letter to little bean little spark

little bean you are really big now and i feel you all the time wiggeling and poking. your baby shower is this weekend and i cant wait, you are going to get so many wonderful welcome gifts i cant wait to see what all you get.
wow, time has came and gone so quickly.
little spark let me tell you somethings. we are totally new at thsi whole paretning idea and its all so very new, as this life is new to you as well you havent even taken your first breath yet!
i just wannted to ask you to be patient and have gaith in us as your parents and your best friends it is our responsibility to have you under our wings until you can fly by yourself someday. please know that we will do our very best in teaching you, loving you, trusting you, understanding you, listening to you and letting you grown the way you need to that is best for you.
we love you and this life will be beautiful.
you are loved.

Week 34 Blabbers

Not knowing how to deal, deal with this depression that has seemed to have flown in so quietly on me. Depression I m not sure if that’s what I would call it, more like the pregnancy blues.
As for my life things couldn’t be better really, I have everything I have ever desired and needed. Yet still I have found myself up against a wall. Being pregnant is a wonderful experience, truly and most of the time its enjoyable. But here in the last month of pregnancy I have found myself cracking. I m so sick of being low key its disgusting.
Im a naturally active person, doing a lot all at once. Going here doing this and doing that. Planning trips and go go go going all the time.
Im hard to keep up with, I don’t like a slow pace or people that work at a slow pace, they are generally annoying to me and my flow,due to the fact that I m high energy.
So being pregnant I have only enough energy for eating ,taking care of my hygiene and maybe an hour or two of activity as long as I don’t have to stand up, my feet hurt and are swollen. I eat in bed most of the time, I read, daydream and doze off.
It gets depressing because it seems I cant finish a project right now, painting I have done a few I did about 14 painting early on in my pregnancy but now I m lucky to paint two or three. Painting takes up so much energy, maybe you wouldn’t think so if you don’t paint but emotionally it is truly draining and I don’t have energy to spare.
Now babies especially newborns have to eat every two hours throughout the day and night. So that means being up ever two hours to nurse, I have been peculiarly on a 2 to 4 hour cycle of sleep and being awake, I think my body is preparing for whats to come. I guess its annoying now because there is no baby here yet to take under my wing so I m just up for no reason and can go back to sleep, probably because I sleep 18 hours.

Week 34

Week 34

The closer it gets the longer it seems to be.

Although we do have plenty left to do before our little sparks arrival we are overly excited to have her ( I think) in our arms.

I have been overly exhausted this week , they say when pregnancy winds down that you get growingly more exhausted daily. I find this to be very true! Today I have been up for 3 hours and its 12:00 midnight. I really did sleep all day and went to bed early!

So I have been just resting. I cant even go to my moms house because by the time I get there I m totally pooped and all I want to do is sleep and we all know one can sleep in that noisy house.

Feeling more and more connected to you little bean I talk to you all day and hold my belly. Sometimes you seem to respond.

You are feisty little bean, I couldn’t expect any less lol.

As for food:

I have been eating just fruit, except maybe for a cookie here and there

Watermelon seems to be what I eat the most of about a whole melon a day plus bananas cantalpoe and honeydew plumbs and apples and strawberries. I drink a lot of apple juice and water. Almonds I have been eating to help my heartburn.